Sunday, July 29, 2007

That delicious ache*

On Friday morning, I felt that almost forgotten sensation in my thighs. That slightly achy feeling brought on by exercise - in this case our walk the night before, which included climbing the considerable number of steps from the bottom of Boulcott St to the top of The Terrace.

Ah yes, that's one of the reasons I love exercise - you can actually feel the progress.

Tomorrow I think I'll feel it even more, after today's gym workout.

It really feels great to be exercising again - and that feeling is one of the best motivations I can find.

*No, not THAT delicious ache! Stop being filthy.

Wednesday, July 25, 2007

Talked to my boy!

I had a lovely chat to Jake on the phone last night. He sent me a text about 2am (!!!), so I called him then.

The amazing thing is, this is the first time I've talked to him since a couple of days after he got there at the end of April. I don't know why I've never rung him - I think to start with I was trying to give him space and he was travelling, so I just fell into the email habit.

The pub he's working in is near Twickenham - something he discovered when he got lost while out running and found the stadium. And he's starting to make plans to go to varsity in Christchurch next year to do a commerce degree. At least the South Island is closer than England!

I'll certainly be ringing him more often now.

Eating was good again yesterday. Didn't go for a walk, but hadn't planned to every day this week anyway.

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Line in the sand

Right, so now I have my starting point. On the scales in my apartment I am 81kg - can't do the decimals like I used to with my other scales, so I'll just have to work with round numbers from now on.

81kg means I have 9kg to lose to reach my goal. I would like to do that before the end of 2007.

Ate well yesterday and went for a walk after work - walking is good at the moment because Craig joins me, which makes it a special part of the day.

I no longer have my flash digital scales, because basically all I have taken from the house is my clothes. I have since picked up a few other things (important stuff like my good knife and some of my beautiful glass), but the rest is still there. It's no problem - just don't have room for all that stuff in a furnished apartment. Mark is quite happy for it to still be there. It's mostly all been moved into Jake's bedroom now, so that's become a bit of a storeroom.

The situation with the house (and therefore our settlement) is very complicated. It goes something like this:
Moved into house January 2005, but didn't pay for it because it wasn't finished and didn't have Code Compliance Certificate.
Paid rent to developer for about a year while we waited for him to complete it
IRD put developer into liquidation for non-payment of tax in February 2006. We stopped paying rent.
Developer's finance company took over responsibility of completing house (and the 6 others in the complex) so they could get their money back.
Finance company put developer into receivership February 2007. We expected them to then finish the houses and go to mortgagee sale so they could get the capital gain for themselves, instead of selling to us at the original contracted price.
July 2007 - finance company went into receivership themselves. That's right folks - our house is owned by Bridgecorp. Bloody hell, could it get any harder?

What we expect to happen is that eventually the receivers will sell the places and we'll lose the house and our deposit. In the meantime, Mark is living there rent-free.

I guess it will all get worked out eventually.

Monday, July 23, 2007

The rise and rise of Smaller Sue

Boy has my life changed a lot – not just in the last couple of months, but in the last couple of years!

*insert wavy flashback image here*

On my 40th birthday, I weighed over 130kg. For quite some time before that, I had been moving toward the decision to lose weight. I believe that making this decision slowly made me more committed to it. It wasn’t a rash decision and therefore also wasn’t easily brushed aside once made.

In late March 2005, I started with Weight Watchers. I did the At Home programme, as I know that meetings are not my style. I weighed 132.5kg on my flash new home scales. I was wearing NZ clothes size 24/26 and my BMI was 43. Walking 2km around the block with the dog was an enormous effort for me.

By February 2006 I had lost 46kg and had just completed a triathlon. My size 16 jeans were too big for me.

The following year was just one long plateau really. I briefly touched 76kg on the scales, but spent most of the time in the high 70s and low 80s. But at least I was very fit and healthy. And wearing size 14 jeans!

At the end of April 2007 I was about 78kg. My only child (Jake) had just left home to travel and work in Europe. I had come to the realisation that my partner of 15 years and I had no future together and I had moved out of our house.

And the change didn't end there. There has been more good change, like getting together with Craig. And some not so good change, like barely going to the gym for two months and letting my eating and drinking get very, well, relaxed.

*wavy flashback image brings us back to the present*

So, it’s time for even more change. Or maybe that should be un-change? I need to take back control of my lifestyle. The main points are:
Good portion control
Snacks to be fruit and vegetables only
Reduce alcohol intake
Reduce treats
Get back to regular exercise

Tomorrow, I will weigh myself for the first time since 1 May. I’m guessing the number will sit around 83kg. I will go back to weighing myself every week.

This week, I will follow the NoCount eating plan again. I will not drink alcohol during the week – Friday and Saturday only. And no sweet things at all. I will go for three 45 minute walks and go to the gym once.

I know that I have achieved an awful lot so far. But I really do want to get to 72kg. And I really do want fitness to be part of the rest of my life.

I am a happy woman, and I know I can be even happier.

Thursday, July 19, 2007

It's me!

Hi everyone. I hope you've all been having a lovely time while I've been missing. Actually, I have kept a bit of an eye on you, but haven't posted or commented at all.

As some of you know - I am very happy and deeply in love. His name is Craig. We've been friends for a long time. And now that has developed into something much more. It's wonderful!

Yes, I did (very) briefly worry that this might all be too fast. But I will not let this chance at happiness slip away.

But why haven't I been blogging? Mostly because I haven't felt the need to. I have someone close to me who is interested in what I have to say, and I don't want to spend time on a computer when I could be spending it with him.

Blogging has been very important to me over the last two years, and the support I've received has been immeasurable. But just now my needs and focus have changed.

What has all this change done to my eating and exercising? To be honest, that's all gone to the pack! No, I'm not an out-of-control slob, stuffing my face and sitting around doing nothing. But my exercise is practically non-existent, and eating is, well, pretty average really.

I haven't been near the scales for nearly two months, but my jeans tell me I've probably put on a few kilos. I guess I'm hovering somewhere in the low 80s.

I'm not completely freaked out by that, but I do know it has to stop. In the last week or so I've started to reduce the number of treats and the amount of alcohol, and we've been going for walks along the waterfront in the evening when we can - the Kiwis among you will know the weather has really been too awful much of the time.

By the end of July I want to have a new routine established - one where exercise is part of my daily routine, but doesn't consume my life and isn't used as an excuse to not be at home. Eating will have to settle into a new pattern and I will need to be vigilant about portion sizes and sneaky treats.

I've been through so much change in my life in the last few months, I think this will really show whether I have really managed to change my lifestyle for good.

Jake update:
Jake is working in a pub in London. They did a bit of travel - Valencia and Paris included - and then he was flat broke. So he's got a job with bed and food provided and still gets a decent amount of cash as well. Apparently he's made friends with the cook, so in exchange for a few beers he gets extra-size staff meals - typical Jake! His mate that he left NZ with has come home. He enjoyed the travel, but decided he didn't want to work there. I have to admit being very jealous that his mother gets to give her boy a hug!