Changed my mind

Think I'd rather be motivated by this photo - my first triathlon!

End of week 1

I've had a good week. Not everything went to plan, but I adapted and feel like I've put in a good effort.

I've completed all three Up & Running sessions, done my fitness test, had one weights' workout and a lovely long walk. I wanted to do more weights, but ended up with two days work and couldn't quite fit it in.

I used my long walk this morning to assess how my body was feeling. A few tired muscles, mostly butt and thighs, but nothing that feels strained or injured.

I've just made a point of reading my motivations again - and must remember to do this frequently.

This photo of me 6 years ago at age 40 helps with the motivation too!

Progress

I've done my first fitness test (results on the sidebar) and the results were somewhat better than I expected for most parts. My sit and reach was awful - I've obviously lost a lot of flexibility.

Have also done my first U&R workout and a good weights session this morning. The body is tired but feeling pretty good. I'm working for the next two days, so workouts will be at 6am!

The photo below shows you the wonderful gym I worked out in this morning.

The training plan

Warning: lists below!

Sunday is planning day, and what better way to spend a wet Sunday afternoon than creating a suite of new spreadsheets?

Sometimes my geekdom just goes into overdrive.

Having lost so much of my hard-won gym fitness, I'm treating this as a new start. So, rather than bring out the very challenging "bus programme" my trainer wrote for me before we ran away, I'm taking a back to basics approach.

Tomorrow I'm going to do a fitness test. This involves:

• weight
• 1km time test (which I'll do on Tuesday as part of the first Up & Running day)
• number of push-ups per minute (I'm going to allow myself the girly version. Mainly because I suck at push-up. Particularly since the whole "cartwheel your bike and smash your shoulder" incident)
• how long I can hold a wall sit
• how long I can hold a plank (or bridge, or whatever you call it)
• my sit-and-reach distance in cm

I'll put the results on here and then repeat the test every four weeks. Should be interesting to compare the start, half-way and finish points of the eight week Up & Running course.

My training for the next eight weeks will look like this:

• Up and Running training: Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday
• resistance training: Monday, Wednesday and Friday
• rest: Sunday

I have a nice set of gym equipment that travels with me in the bus. It consists of hand weights (the cool dial-up ones so you only have one set gives you different weights), a skipping rope, a yoga mat, a Swiss ball and a BOSU.

For resistance training I'll do a sort of "whole body" routine that I can vary as my fitness increase by adding extra weight or more challenging variations. The basic workout entails:

• tricep dip
• bent row
• military press
• chest press
• squat
• reverse crunch
• Romanian deadlift
• alternating Superwoman
• toe raise

Feels nice to have a plan again.

It just keeps getting better

There are so many things we love about our new lifestyle.

And I've just found another one.

I can commit to planning my weeks (the next eight) around my exercise, not shoe-horning exercise into a packed working/sleeping/living schedule.

We have no major work commitments over the next couple of months, apart from some writing work for me which is pretty flexible. We're staying in a lovely little town with quiet, flat streets and very little traffic - therefore no traffic pollution either. And there's even a room here I can use for weight-training when the weather is wet (I have my handweights etc with me).

So everything is in place, I just have to make sure I keep my head in order too.

With so much free time I could just make vague plans about when I'll exercise. But I know enough about myself to know that won't work.

Sunday evenings will be used to plan for the week ahead. I've already decided Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday will be my Up & Running days, so I'll need to decide what else I'll do that week - weight training, cycling, hiking, etc. I'm aiming for four hours of planned exercise each week; it would be very easy to miss that target without sufficient planning. There are plenty of beautiful walks around here we haven't done yet - and that way Craig is included in some of the exercise too.

We're expecting to leave Whitianga around 20 July, so then I'll just have to adapt the plan. Because we don't know where we'll be heading - another thing we love about our lifestyle!

Body check

How is my body feeling at the moment? When we start the first week of the training plan next week, am I going to feel the lack of regular exercise?

Craig and I went for a bit of a walk today. Not to the local beach or even to the pub for a drink (although we did that later). We walked into New Chums Beach (other blog post here), which takes about 20 minutes each way.

It's not a difficult walk, but does offer a few challenges: wet feet, rock hopping, mud scrambling, up over a little hill and plenty of sand walking.

So, how does my body feel tonight? Well, ankles are a bit sore and I'm a little tired from all that lovely fresh air, but at no stage did I find it too difficult.

I feel like my general fitness is pretty good. But that doesn't mean next week isn't going to hurt.

The reward for our walk.

Hydration

I need to get back in the water habit.

I used to be really good at it, but that seems to have slipped away. When I had an office job I always had a water bottle sitting on my desk, but you can't do that working at the pack house - it's a food handling area so you can only have a drink on your breaks. And then we'd usually just have time to slurp down a cup of tea before the next session - of up to two and a half hours (so you don't want to drink too much anyway because then you have to get someone to cover for you while you go pee).

Pack house work is finished now, so that excuse is gone. I try to drink plenty of water in the morning and up to early evening, then ease off a bit. Otherwise I'm up too often during the night. Yet another balancing act!

Why am I doing the Up & Running online course?

I want to run 5km, just once in my life. Even if that’s the only time I do it, I want to know I can.

I want to feel strong and slim again.

I know how good regular exercise makes me feel. I want that feeling again. I need something to help me get back in the habit.

I want to be fit enough to do whatever I want. Climb a mountain (OK, a little one), kayak or ride for a couple of hours, go to a Zumba class or do a physically demanding job. Whatever it is, I don’t want to be held back by not being in shape.

I want to lose 20kg. The running course is part of the commitment I’m making to weight loss.

I want to be proud of how I look.

Starting summary

My weight this morning was 91.8kg. Not very flash, particularly as it means I've put on 5kg in 3 months!

My highest ever recorded weight was 132.5kg in April 2005 and my lowest was 76kg in December 2006. Over the last four years my weight has slowly crept up and I have spent most of the last 2 years in the high 80s/low 90s.


September 2007



I have done no regular exercise since November. I have also only worked for 3 months out of the last 10 - that work has been quite physical, so that may have helped my fitness a little.

It has been very hard for me to put any really effort into getting back to a healthy weight. There are lots of reasons for this, not least that my life is so much happier now. But I really do need to do this - if only so I can stop thinking about it all the time!

As Anne (who has a private blog) recently said 'Remember how good slim felt?'

Balance

It's not something I've ever been very good at - balance. In fact, the other day I tripped over a ledge about 2cm high and fell arse over tit. Got great bruises on my knees to prove it.

But the other balance I've been thinking about is exercise vs. food. In the past three years I've spent an absolute fortune on gyms, personal trainers and private fitness studios. All so I could be fit - and exactly the same weight as when I started.

Training really hard lets me get away with eating and drinking too much.

That's not very balanced.

I don't want to tip the balance too far the other way. Just ease off a bit on the food and drink, add in the new running course - should all be good!

Irony

Two and a half years since I wrote the last post on this blog (about retiring from running), and I'm about to embark on a running course!

Lots of reasons for this - and for writing about it here.

I've always felt I let running beat me. Did I hate it because I sucked at it, or did I suck at it because I hated it?

I've tried running again a few times since then. When we went to Outward Bound in June 2009, we had to be able to run 3km in 25 minutes, so I tried to build up to running that far. Trouble is, I can walk it in that time, so I never really had to push myself.

Have tried to do the Couch to 5K thing a couple of times too, but always fizzled out after a couple of weeks.

Now I've signed up for Up & Running, an online running course designed specifically for women. I'm going to track my progress here - not tell you what the course involves as such (because that would be giving it away), but how I'm feeling about it.

And why am I going to write about it here? This blog charted some pretty major changes in my life.

There's a job to finish.

Oh by the way

I have officially retired from any events that include running.

I just don't like it.

In fact, it makes me miserable.

And that puts me off exercise generally.

So, why do it, when I usually love exercise?

Soon be Christmas!

It's OK, Jake hasn't kidnapped me, although it feels a bit like the festive season has!

We had three weekends in a row away from home, so last weekend was busy trying to get lots of stuff done around the house. We did manage to sneak an early morning kayak on the harbour on Sunday, which was lovely.

Have been flat out with work (and work functions!) but....

I HAVE A MONTH OFF! I am finishing on 19 December and not back at work till 20 January. How blissful is that?

Craig has almost as much time off, although he is working until 23 December. After Christmas we are going to drag the caravan to the Far North for a 3+ week trip - and of course the kayaks and mountain bikes will be going with us.

I am going to run a trip blog while I'm away, so keep an eye out here for the link if you're interested.

Look - I can drink and BBQ at the same time! Talented girl.

Nostalgia shot

We’ve just had our new fridge delivered, and it made me remember this photo from this post.

That fridge got left behind when I left the old house (and life) behind. I don’t like my chances of talking Jake into posing for another shot like this.

I spoke to him a couple of days ago when he was in Amsterdam (and I don’t even want to think about what he was getting up to). He is ambivalent about coming home – excited to be seeing everyone, but worried that it’s all going to feel strange and flat.

He has not yet really had to face the fact of his parents separating, which happened just after he left in April last year. That may take some getting his head around.

He’s not met Craig yet either, although he did work with one of his sons briefly. Mind you, I think Craig is more worried about this meeting than Jake is.

So, things are feeling a bit unsettled, but I’m sure it will be fine. Jake is not the sort to make trouble where it doesn’t exist and all he wants is for us to be happy. And happy is something that I certainly am; whether Mark is or not is none of my concern.

Anyway, my boy is coming home and that’s just too cool for words!

See how far my bottom lip sticks out?

Not my most successful effort, the duathlon.

I was having real doubts about my ability to do the second (5km) run, but was happy to walk parts of it if I needed to, despite my earlier NO WALKING resolve.

What I didn’t expect was to strike trouble on the ride. It has always been my strongest discipline, and having done the 50km recently I was feeling fine about it. Maybe that was my downfall?

It was a very windy day on Sunday – gusting over 80km/hour on the course. So the first run was very tough, with some vile headwinds. In fact I even had to walk parts of that – I could walk just as fast as I could run in those conditions.

But the ride REALLY hurt. I was trying to keep my speed over 25km/hour on average, and it was probably too big a task in the wind. By about 12km I was getting cramp in my right thigh and it just kept getting worse. By the end of the 20km the upper leg was cramped solid and I just COULDN’T walk or run it off.

So, I made it about 1km into the second run and then pulled out.

DNF. Shit!

I spent the afternoon parked on the couch watching movies and sulking.

But, of course, I’m over it now.

I think there were a number of contributing factors. I spent the week on antibiotics because of a kidney infection – which also meant I hardly trained at all. I didn’t adjust my expectations to the weather conditions. And – I think this is the biggie – I listened to my own negative self talk. And, really, I just wasn’t prepared for the distance. I’m not a strong runner and the mental toughness to push through the challenge wasn’t there.

End of self-analysis, time to move on.

From now till Christmas I’ll focus on fitness for weight loss, so keeping my cardio load quite high. Then in the New Year – train for a short duathlon on 18 January (2.5km/15km/2.5km) and hit the medium duathlon again on 8 February.

Then I have a really big challenge planned, but more on that later…

Just stuff...

Well, our general election may not have been as high profile nor as exciting as the American presidential race, but it has been an interesting weekend.

I thought Helen’s concession speech was wonderful, but could everyone please stop talking about her as if she died? All her opponents who have been unable to utter a good word about her for years are suddenly offering up glowing tributes.

Still, sincerity never had any place in politics…

Less than a week till the duathlon now. I’m mostly excited about it, but have moments of questioning my sanity. I have reached the conclusion that I always need an event or specific activity to aim and train for. It helps me so much with my focus and I really enjoy feeling myself improving and getting fitter.

Speaking of looking forward to things – just a few weeks now till Jake gets home. I’ve been getting texts from lots of different countries lately – I gave him a three week Contiki tour for his 20th birthday, so he’s having a last blast around Europe before heading back to NZ. Oh, and he’s having a week staying with friends in Greece as well!

Having my boy home is definitely going to be the best Xmas pressie.

Motivation Monday

Well, who's been a slack tart then!

What's motivating me today? The great bunch of people I work with!

We had a training brick at our place yesterday - 1km run/10km ride/2km run - with the eight of us who are doing the duathlon together in TWO WEEKS (!!!!!). Then we had a BBQ brunch, along with the various partners, kids, dogs, etc.

I looked around at this diverse group of people and just found it completely motivating. The duathletes range from 32 to 50 in age, come from all walks of life and have varying sports backgrounds from former NZ representatives (women's cricket) to never having done an event in their lives.

And here we all are, with a common goal. Two of them are now talking about going on to do a marathon in the next 18 months, one is trying to get back the fitness he's lost in the 10 years since giving up competitive sport, one is so fit he does this sort of thing for a blast - and we're all in this together, helping, advising, competing a little, and having some really great fun along the way.

It's been a neat way to get my groove on again.

The rotating kilo

Kathryn made a comment on my last post about how frustrating it is to lose and gain the same kilo over and over. I’ve been carrying this disturbing image of a rotating kilo ever since.

So, where does the bloody thing go?

I know when I gain that kilo, it likes to wrap itself comfortably around my hips to create that unsightly muffin top.

But what about when I lose it?

It can’t be holidaying in the fridge, for I’m sure I’d notice it. And it’s not relaxing in my undie drawer, there’s just no room. I guess it’s probably skulking under my bed, waiting to slide back onto my body under the cover of night.

Or maybe the kilo is clever enough to distribute itself around as random grams of fat. Maybe my healthy home made muesli now contains fat bombs that slip away from my stomach to find their favourite hip resting place. Maybe there are fat drops in the shower head that stick to my arse while I’m showering.

I’m going to have to come up with a subterfuge. Perhaps I should lose the kilo while working in Auckland and then try to sneak home so it doesn’t hitch a ride on my butt. Or ride very fast and hope it scatters behind me, hopelessly lost and gone forever.

Or introduce it to Kathryn’s kilo so they can fall in love and run away together…

Motivation Monday

What’s motivating me today? The scales.

I’ve got all this stuff lined up nicely:
I’m exercising well and regularly. I’m being challenged in this area and really enjoying that.
I’m doing my usual no drinking of alcohol in October – and this year I’m extending it until after the duathlon in November. I definitely feel better and can really feel the benefits when I exercise.
I’ve got my head around how I want to approach food – BUT I’M NOT DOING IT CONSISTENTLY.

Today I weigh exactly 100 grams more than I did at the start of August. 83.9kg.

Okay, we all know I’m great at maintaining. But in that time I’ve only strung 2 weeks of losses together. The last 7 weeks have been up and down each week alternately.

Too annoying.

I know the way I want to approach eating is right. But I’m still not getting my head into it properly. I know that it’s not going to be an overnight change. But I would like to see some success to encourage me.

I am definitely not going back to tracking points. It drives me nuts!

But I am going to keep a food diary for a few weeks. What I eat, when and where.

Why?

To better identify my ‘weak’ times – what time of day do I snack when I don’t need to, which days to I have more trouble controlling, which locations cause me more problems – home, away on business or at the caravan? And then I can be more on my guard against them.

One thing I do know – I need to stop letting myself off. It’s this sort of thing:
It’s been a hard two days in Auckland – I deserved some cheese and crackers (and a little piece of brownie) while I wait at the airport to fly home.
Mmmmm, that black pudding, mushrooms and eggs on savoury French toast sound great. We only go out to brunch once a week, so I may as well have it.
If you look hard enough, you can find a reason to let yourself off every day. And there’s your eating shot all to hell.

So, I’m also going to write a few simple rules at the front of my food diary. Like:
Brunch – healthiest option only. If there’s no fruit muesli and yoghurt on the menu, its poached eggs on toast with grilled tomatoes on the side.
Airport lounge – a cup of tea and a piece of fruit in the evening, or cereal and fruit in the morning.
Caravan – Craig can eat cashews. I can’t. Find some rice crackers.

It’s a long process, this learning thing!

Motivation Monday

What's motivating me today? The ride yesterday.

Well, not the actual ride, but the way it felt when I finished. I was absolutely knackered, absolutely everything hurt and it was absolutely fantastic!

I set myself a really hard target and got so close to it the minute and half really doesn't matter that much.

I'd forgotten how good that feeling is - setting your sights high and knowing you worked like hell to reach them.

So, time for another target - my duathlon times. Forget about pissing about with whimpy targets like just finishing the damn thing - I know I can do that.

The distances? 2.5km run/20km cycle/5km run

Target one - no walking, not even in transition
Target two - one hour and 50 minutes (I really want to type two hours there, but I'm not letting myself)